Ok, I have to admit, I'm not really in dieting hell. I have felt like a new person since I met with Julie, the Nutritionist at Metro Health Hospital! She was the answer to my prayers.
I have stopped weighing myself every single day. I decided that I was obsessing about what the scale says and not focusing on how I look and how my clothes were fitting. I felt really good this week. I didn't workout on Sunday, and I felt guilty as hell about it all day. I just felt like my muscles needed a rest. Today, which is Thursday, I think I feel stronger because I let myself rest. I was only doing 10 reps of each part of my body I was working and now I'm doing 12.
Since we talked last....I can't remember where I was at but over the last week I've lost another 2.5 pounds or so. I really noticed it the first cool day we had this week. I haven't worn long pants to work since last winter and I had to break them back out because I was freezing my ass off. I actually had to wear a belt. I was so excited. There is a brown shirt I wear alot and that was even loose on me. Victory!
I think that the things that are surprising me the most is that I don't feel like I am dieting. I feel like I am making positive changes in my life, and getting healthier in the process. Making better food choices. I still had two hotdogs at the Varsity football game on Friday, but I've been working out like a mad woman so I think I'm kicking in my metabolism.
I have a long way to go, but my black lingerie that is hanging in my bedroom is only 36.5 pounds away. Alot less than the last time I wrote. It feels good, and I have had people ask me if I have lost some weight. That makes me feel super good. I know it's not much, but it's pounds that are gone that I will NEVER see again.
Luckily, at the beginning of this I got on some anti-anxiety meds from Dr. Kern. Let me tell you, life in the Watkins household has been freaking insane. I'm not saying that things are stressful between Scott and I, its not that at all. We have the best relationship! The stress comes from finances, work, kids.....oh the kids have been driving me crazy lately. They are bickering like crazy. Sam has been the crabbiest ever. As I type this, she has just started whining in her bed. I don't know what her problem is, but she is cranky.
She has had a fever and I think she is cutting some more teeth. I guess that will do it.
Back to my transformation. I've taken a before photo and once I get to my goal weight I'm going to post a before and after. You will be shocked! SHOCKED! Because I am not going to fail this time. I'm meeting with Julie at Metro Health again in December and I am not going to let myself or her down. I'm also going to wear this black little nightie that I have hanging in my bedroom for Scott. Maybe on Christmas Eve or something. Wouldn't that be a nice little present?
I feel good right now. I admit though, today I was off my game. I had some taco's from Taco Bell. But Julie told me that if I had a craving to go ahead...but in moderation. So, I did. I didn't pig out, I didn't go crazy and eat 10 taco's or anything. But I ate a couple taco's and ealier in the day I worked my ass off for 45 minutes. I'll do the same thing tomorrow.
Tina told me that I could have her mini-trampoline. That will be helpful to get more of an aerobic workout. Honestly, I hate to walk on the treadmill. Seriously, I hate the walking and jogging. I know that I'm losing weight right now by working out with weights and a little bit of cardio. At some point I'm going to have to kick it up a notch and start some heavy duty cardio workouts. I need to remind her about the trampoline because I want to get started on it NOW. I like having a change of pace. I'm not bored with this "diet" and I am motivated.
Now that I have started to lose weight, I want to work harder to lose the weight. I want to work harder to feel better. I want to live a long and happy and healthy life. And you should see Scott, he's losing too and he is looking soooo good. Makes me want to jump on him......if he was ever home, lol. He's been working so much lately that I barely see him and when he is home he is getting caught up on sleep. It's ok, we'll make up for it later.....when I can wear my skinny black lingerie.
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