Oops, I Did It Again!

I've been upset with myself since Monday. Going camping left me with a total breakdown in my diet. It's my own fault, of course. This seems to be my habit. I choose what to put in my mouth. I am a person who has to be in the right mindset to eat healthy and exercise. Scott wanted to walk the last two evenings and I said I didn't want to.

It occurred to me that the reason I am tired and feel like hell is because I'm not eating healthy. When I started my weight loss quest, after the first couple of days, I felt amazing. I had energy and I actually wanted to get off my butt and do something. This entire week, I have felt like crap! I am shocked at how lousy I feel and then I have an epiphany and realize...duh, it's what you're eating dumbass!

So, with that in mind I'm ready to go back at it. Maybe I do need to go to another WW meeting. I wasn't that impressed with my first meeting, but it did motivate me. There were women of all ages at the meeting. Some thin, some....not so much. Scott has been in the same boat and he keeps asking me when we'll start walking and stop eating junk. He's ready, I need to be too.

I get ticked because I know that I won't lose enough to look good in a swimsuit this summer, but I didn't put this weight on overnight. It's come on over the last 7 years, mostly since I had John four years ago. I really let myself go. Then I remind myself that I'd thought about swimsuit season last fall and at that time I could have done something about it but didn't. I'd just had Sam and I could have kept up my eating habits from pregnancy...would have been better than the route I took by getting back into my old eating habits. I was sick during my whole pregnancy so I was used to eating very little and staying away from pop and chocolate.

Well, hindsight is 20/20 right? So, I need to focus on the future and make small changes that will help me be more healthy. Then, add the walking and I'll be much better.

Not much fun in my post today. It's more of a reality check. It's really tough to lose weight and to eat healthy and make yourself exercise every day. But I try to think about how I felt when I weighed 45 pounds less than I do right now. I remember that I had confidence. I felt good, I was not tired all the time, I had energy. I felt like I looked good. I want to get back to that.