Thanks Kathy!

Lessons in Life by Regina Brett :

1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
4. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.
8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.
9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.
12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.
13. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.
15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.
16. Life is too short for long pity parties. Get busy living, or get busy dying.
17. You can get through anything if you stay connected and put in today.
18. A writer writes. If you want to be a writer, write.
19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else. 20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.
21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.
23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.
24. The most important sex organ is the brain.
25. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words: "In five years, will this matter?"
27. Always choose life.
28. Forgive everyone, everything.
29. What other people think of you is none of your business.
30. Time heals almost everything. Give time, time.
31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
32. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.
33. Believe in miracles.
34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.
35. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.
36. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young.
37. Your children get only one childhood. Make it memorable.
38. Read the Psalms. They cover every human emotion.
39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.
41. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
42. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
43. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
44. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
45. The best is yet to come.
46. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
47. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
48. If you don't ask, you don't get.
49. Yield.
50. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift.

Diet And Politics Free Zone

No politics tonight. I'm too sleepy. Yesterday I thought we were over the hump on getting Sam to sleep all night long. Well, she did one night in a row. (hmmm) She woke me up several times again last night and was raring to go at 6:30am. She has a pretty tight schedule. Up at 6:30am for a bottle, breakfast at 8:30, nap at 9:30, lunch at noon, nap at 1:30, supper at 5 and bed between 7 and 8:30. Then it starts all over again. Thank goodness she is on a schedule the rest of the day, it's the only way I can plan on getting anything done.

We went to the St. Patrick's Festival in Parnell today. Jason didn't, of course, but I took Jourdan, John, and Sam. John had so much fun with Aiden....oh yeah, I forgot to say we went with Kathie, Aiden, and Loren. Well, the boys jumped in this castle thing over and over and had a great time. They played games and won tickets that they got to turn in for a prize. We even ran into Sally's brother and his kids. Jourdan was thrilled about that! :) So, it was a good day.

So Sami is all over the place now. She doesn't just roll anymore, she crawls and she gets around the house! She also learned that she can crawl and push herself up to a sitting position...that just happened a day or so ago. (Did I already post that? I'm stuck on duh!) It seems so strange to see her sitting up. She's really small so it doesn't seem like she should be doing everything she does. Today, I gave her toast and let her feed herself! (I know, I was shocked I did it too!) They were tiny little pieces, but she loved it. I have been having a hard time getting her to eat in the morning lately, I think she is sick of cereal and fruit. So, the toast worked like a charm. No chocking, no gagging, just lots of drool!

I'm trying to figure out how to get some photo's on my page. When I have more than five minutes to look around my site, I'll put some pics of the kids for you. Ok, I'm off to bed...it's super late and I know I won't be sleeping in. Later!

Sleepy Sami Slept ALL Night!

Ok, I had my fun with my politic rant, lets get down to some real business here. Sam slept ALL night last night for the FIRST time since she was born. I'm not kidding either. All night long. I was up late doing homework and got into bed around midnight or so and she just slept and slept. Yeah, right? Well, for whatever reason....I kept waking up and looking at her in her bed. It was freaking me out that she was sleeping all night. It didn't help that we were having thunderstorms and Jourdan and John were both in my bed! Heaven forbid it should lightening during the night when a kid is in his or her own room....doesn't happen in my house. (I hate to admit it, but I was the same way until I was in my 20's...I hated storms).

So, I woke up at 4:25 AM! I'm thinking....why am I awake? I try to roll over and fall back to sleep. Not happening. John was crowding me. We have a king size bed and I got about 6 inches to sleep on. So, I got up and had coffee. Scott was up and out for work at 5am, Jason left at 6am for a trap shooting competition south of Lansing, and I started doing laundry. I was on fire today! I did laundry, moved all the furniture around in my room and finished painting it. (That was real fun with John coming in every five minutes saying, "mom I have to tell you something in your ear" and then touching the wet paint!) This took me most of the day.

I wasn't finished yet, I moved all my furniture out of my living room and cleaned the carpet. My dear friend Alice loaned me her cleaner and my carpet looks brand new again. Then, of course, more laundry, sweep and mop, clean, clean, clean. We have company coming from Ohio Monday so the house has to be in order, of course. It was pretty good because I had a ton of energy and never sat down until 7pm for dinner. Jourdan, bless her heart, helped me with Sam all day. She's such a good big sister. She and John played with her and fed her while I was painting and cleaning, so that was a great help.

I wonder how many calories I burned today? It's almost midnight and I feel like I've been hit by a truck....but I got a bunch of stuff done today. Scott was really happy about it too. I've been wanting to paint our room since we moved in over a year ago. We painted it Country White, so it's really creamy and our room is really big to begin with but we all agreed that the room looks even bigger now.

I think I was saying yesterday that Sally came over for dinner. We had a nice time! I love hanging out with my friends. I've really been missing Janice because I haven't seen much of her lately. She is working this summer, an on call deal, so her work schedule is pretty hectic. Matter of fact, Brady was here one day this week while she worked and he and John got along so good. It was the best they've ever gotten along. No scrapping, no fighting over toys(John is selfish with his toys), no crying. They were really good! But, Janice is busy and I'm busy and pretty soon weeks go by. They just moved so they are getting their yard in order. She had a real mess, just like we did and has been working like a dog to get it nice....so we have that in common.

Ok, I'm exhausted so I'm outta here. I feel a little strange because the last 3 or 4 Saturdays I've been with Sally and Alice. Sally and Alice, where are you????? It's girls night, and there aren't any girls! No coctails, no grape cigars! I even made mixed CD's! WTF!!! Alright, I'm not really upset...I'm to damn tired to be upset, lol.

Republican or Democrat Congress....They Both Stink!

Now you've got me started. I already said that I love politics. I was talking to a friend of mine this week and she said that President Bush "ruined this country". Scott spoke up and said, "Or maybe the Democrat congress has ruined the country?" I thought fists would fly, lol. I thought I better check this out. I started thinking about how long the Democrats have had control of Congress and I started wondering about what they have done.

Does anyone remember that our Democrat congress couldn't even put a bill together that fixes the AMT and it delayed everyone being able to file their tax returns this year?


Democrats are invested in failure in Iraq even as Rep. John Murtha (D-PA) concedes that Gen. Petraeus’ security strategy is “working” and independent media report that conditions on the ground are indisputably improving.

Democrat failure to enact an emergency troop funding bill that does not undermine our forces’ success in Iraq.

Democrat failure to shield Americans from higher taxes under the AMT; refunds to 32 million taxpayers could be delayed next year.

Democrat failure to pass a FISA bill that permanently closes the terrorist loophole.

Democrat failure to pass 11 of the 12 annual budget bills that fund basic government services.

Democrat failure to pass a “commonsense” energy plan, as promised, that produces new energy and reduces prices for Americans.

Democrat failure to live up to their promises on earmark reform and sign the House Republican earmark reform petition.

Democrats plan an historic $3.5 trillion tax increase.

Democrats’ rock-bottom approval ratings. (Congress’ Approval Rating at 20%; Bush’s Approval at 32%)


And now, for the thing that pisses me off the most! President Bush has asked Congress to lift the ban on domestic oil drilling....they have said NO! They claim that they high gas prices will be Bush's legacy, but what about Congress? We tend to forget that the President cannot act alone and neither can Congress. So, aren't both parties to blame for the gas prices? What is going to happen when gas hits $7.00 a gallon and people can't even afford to get to work? I'm sick to death of hearing democrat strategists on Fox News saying, "We have to cut back, we have to buy hybrids and fuel efficient cars". Well can we all afford to purchase a new fuel efficient car? What about right now? What happens to people who need the help right now? Do they honestly think that the farmers can cut back on their diesel consumption? Or truckers? It's their jobs and families on the line...they have to consume fuel to make money to sustain life! So, I guess we'll just keep paying more and more for fuel. Because, it's going to be George Bush's legacy and according to the Democrats, he deserves it.

Now, in some fairness, I'll give my two cents worth about the Republicans who didn't do anything for the two years prior to the Democrats coming in...with regard to gas prices. Pull your heads out of your asses! People weren't happy with the Republicans either and that's why they lost control of Congress in 2006. I just don't happen to think we're any better off.

Just Say NO To Obama!

I thought I'd do a little political blogging! Just wanting to spread some cheer....or maybe just give you something to think about.



In Response To A 1996 Independent Voters Of Illinois Questionnaire, Obama Indicated That He Supported Banning The "Manufacture, Sale And Possession Of Handguns." Question: "Do you support state legislation to ... ban the manufacture, sale and possession of handguns?" Obama's Response: "Yes." (Independent Voters Of Illinois Independent Precinct Organization 1996 General Candidate Questionnaire, Barack Obama Responses, 9/9/96) (http://www.rnc.org/)

Mr. Obama....can you say 2nd Amendment???

As Obama Travels To Michigan, Will He Explain His Support For Higher Energy Costs To Voters?

Today, Obama Will Campaign In Michigan. "The road to the White House doesn't necessarily run through Flint, but it's a natural side trip for any Democrat who preaches economic recovery for the middle class. Barack Obama will take that side trip on the way to a large rally at Joe Louis Arena in Detroit later today." (Chris Christoff, "Obama To Stop In Flint Today," Detroit Free Press, 6/16/08)

Will Obama Tell Michigan Voters That He "Would Have Preferred A Gradual Adjustment" In Gas Prices?

Last Week, Obama Said He Would Have Preferred A Gradual Increase In Gas Prices. Obama: "Well, I think that we have been slow to move in a better direction when it comes to energy usage. And the president, frankly, hasn't had an energy policy. And as a consequence, we've been consuming energy as if it's infinite. We now know that our demand is badly outstripping supply with China and India growing as rapidly as they are. So..." CNBC's John Hardwood: "So could these high prices help us?" Obama: "I think that I would have preferred a gradual adjustment. The fact that this is such a shock to American pocketbooks is not a good thing." (CNBC's "Your Money, Your Vote," 6/10/08)

Consuming energy "as if it's infinite"? WTF! For three years, since prices started going way up, I rarely make unnecessary trips in an effort to save gas. Most people aren't being frivolous, they just need to get to work and to he grocery store. You are not in touch with the reality of the real working class.

Will Obama Tell Hardworking Michigan Families That He Opposes Gas Tax Relief?

Obama Opposes Gas Tax Relief. "Obama does not support the 'gas tax holiday' and has said the average motorist would not benefit significantly from such a suspension..." (Sara Kugler, "Clinton Focuses On Obama's Opposition To Suspending Federal Gas Tax For Summer Driving Months," The Associated Press, 4/28/08)

McCain, the Republican nominee, was the first to propose a temporary suspension of the federal gas tax. His plan would lift the 18.4 cents per gallon tax during peak summer travel months. It also would suspend the 24.4 cent diesel tax. Obama does not support a suspension of the gas tax, which he described as a political scheme that would save the average driver $25 to $28.

This would save the average driver only $28 for the whole summer? Are you kidding me? Who wouldn't be happy with a drop of 18 cents per gallon in gas? Scott and I both drive a diesel and that would drop it almost a quarter per gallon. He's spending OVER a hundred gallons of diesel a month. This would have been over a three month period. We would have probably saved about $100. Well, it's hundred bucks we could have paid a bill with or saved for something else....but no, I'm much happier giving it to the price gouging oil companies.

As Of June 16, 2008, The Average Price For A Gallon Of Regular Unleaded Gasoline In Michigan Was Over $4.11. (AAA Website, http://www.fuelgaugereport.com/MIavg.asp, Accessed 6/16/08)

Will Obama Tell Michigan Voters That He Supports A Tax On Coal And Natural Gas - Both Large Sources Of Energy In Michigan?

Hello, if you live in or near a city, this is what you heat your house and hot water with. Isn't it hard enough to pay the bills?

Obama Told A Texas Newspaper: "What We Ought To Tax Is Dirty Energy, Like Coal And, To A Lesser Extent, Natural Gas." ("Q&A With Sen. Barack Obama," San Antonio Express-News, 2/19/08)

Nearly four-fifths of Michigan households use natural gas as their primary energy source for home heating."

Obama voted NO on prohibiting minors crossing state lines for abortion. CONGRESSIONAL SUMMARY: To increase funding for the vigorous enforcement of a prohibition against taking minors across State lines in circumvention of laws requiring the involvement of parents in abortion decisions consistent with the Child Custody Protection Act.

SUPPORTER'S ARGUMENT FOR VOTING YES:Sen. ENSIGN: This amendment enables enforcing the Child Custody Protection Act, which passed the Senate in a bipartisan fashion by a vote of 65 to 34. Too many times we enact laws, and we do not fund them. This is going to set up funding so the law that says we are going to protect young children from being taken across State lines to have a surgical abortion--we are going to make sure those people are protected.

Voted NO on notifying parents of minors who get out-of-state abortions. This bill prohibits taking minors across State lines in circumvention of laws requiring the involvement of parents in abortion decisions. Makes an exception for an abortion necessary to save the life of the minor. Authorizes any parent to sue unless such parent committed an act of incest with the minor. Imposes a fine and/or prison term of up to one year on a physician who performs an abortion on an out-of-state minor in violation of parental notification requirements in their home state.

Proponents recommend voting YES because:
This bill deals with how young girls are being secretly taken across State lines for the purpose of abortion, without the consent of their parents or even the knowledge of their parents, in violation of the laws of the State in which they live. 45 states have enacted some sort of parental consent laws or parental notification law. By simply secreting a child across State lines, one can frustrate the State legislature's rules. It is subverting and defeating valid, constitutionally approved rights parents have.

Are you kidding me? At the mother of a 13 year old girl, I wouldn't want my child to be free to have someone take her out of state in order to have an abortion without me knowing. NP! Not that I think I'll ever be in that position, but why the hell would any politician think that a parent shouldn't be notified if their underaged teenage daughter is having an abortion. That absolutely terrifies me.

Yes, I Am A Republican!

It's Friday already! This week has flown right by. I've been running Jason all over the countryside....nothing new there. I've done about a hundred loads of laundry this week, washed all my cupboards, mudded and sanded around the windows in my bedroom and now I've started to paint. On top of that I have a history class I'm taking right now and it's TOUGH! I thought it was a History class but the Professor claims it's a writing course. Hmm, history elective.....but being treated as a writing class....ok! We have a written paper due every week and it has to be in APA format. Everyone know what that is? Yeah, me neither! I researched it and thought I had it under control. Well, my Professor is the APA Nazi and I got knocked 10 points because my margin was 1.25 instead of 1. Stupid, stupid me!

Enough rambling on about that. Oops one more thing, I squeezed in taking John to the circus this week too. It was outside and it was beyond HOT! John had a good time but I was miserable. C'est la vie!

I've been avoiding this topic for all of 4 minutes while I've been typing......weight loss. I'm just stuck here. I feel like I've been running around all week but I guess it's just not enough to consider it exercise. Painting felt like I was exercising....but it's not getting my heartrate up...just making me sore. I'm wondering what will happen when we go camping again? I've got to get off my butt and walk when we are camping. There is no excuse for us not walking because there isn't a whole lot to do when you're camping. I'll report on that when we get back.

OMG! I almost forgot. My friend Sally was here last night for dinner. We're sitting here and the O'Reilly Factor comes on. Well, we love Fox News and we like Bill because he really calls people on what they say and what they do. I have to laugh because Sally blurts out, "ARE YOU GUYS REPUBLICAN?????" Hello, did ya just meet me? LOL. I love to talk about politics with people who have a different opinion from mine. We're both trying to convince each other that we are right. Scott had to step in because it was about to come to blows. Just kidding. At least this will be an interesting election year. We have a democrat, Obama running as well as a democrat, McCain running for President. Gives us conservatives alot to hope for.

With that said, I'm on my way to Walmart....to get groceries Alice! Yes, I'm grocery shopping AGAIN! LOL

See ya!

My Friends Are My Lifeline!

Did you all think that I forgot about you? Nope, didn't happen! I've just gotten myself too busy and one day goes by and then the next and then it's been a week. Shame on me, this is my life line!

Ok, I admit it....I'm stuck here at 10 pounds and it's really pissing me off. Going on vacation really screwed me up and I fell right off the Weight Watchers wagon. I had a great suggestion from my friend Nicki. I was really disappointed with the WW meeting I went to several weeks ago. Hello, find a different meeting to go to. I can't believe that Lowell is the only place to find a WW meeting. So, I'll get on their website and check it out. I need accountability. I feel like I have that with this blog but you guys aren't tough enough on me. So, here I am, not losing any more weight. (Remember I told you before I'll blame it on anything that doesn't involve addressing what I'm putting in my mouth....so this time, it's your fault! LOL)

Maybe I should go in the bedroom and put on my swimsuit just to shock myself into counting my points again. I haven't even walked this week, how pathetic! Scott asks me every night and every night I tell him how tired I am. (What number was that on my excuse list???) We have been busting our butts around here to get the house and yard in order. Oh, my back yard.....it's a disguting place to be. But, it's getting better. Did I tell you that we had girls night on my patio a few weeks ago? See, I can't even remember what I've typed. I spent like a week working on the side yard and getting the patio ready for girls night. I cleaned, shoveled stone, hung lights, moved patio furniture in....and we had girls night. It lasted about 15 minutes. We were sitting there in the comfy chairs having a bloody mary and the wind picked up a little. Wow, we thought it was a nice breeze...felt really good. Well, then hurricane Betty moved in on us and we had to run for safety. I thought for sure that we had a tornado warning because the wind was so terrible. So, we had coctails and grape cigars out in the garage.

I don't think I'll host another girls night because I was so distracted by the kids. John was so worried about how long I was going to stay outside. Scott was sleeping and I was worried we would wake him up. We like to play music and sing at the top of our lungs. Mostly Meatloaf! Anyhow, it was tough for me to relax and really enjoy it. But, I did eat double dipped chocolate peanuts. See what I mean? I can't be eating that crap when I am trying to lose weight.

I'm thinking about how to get myself back on track. I can't believe that I'm the only woman to have this diet problem. I think I probably need to start going to WW meetings. It's the only way i'm going to pull my head out of my ass and start doing what I need to do to be healthier. Getting off the chocolate would be a good place to start. But, mark my words, as soon as I get going and really get myself together....I'll start my period!

Oops, I Did It Again!

I've been upset with myself since Monday. Going camping left me with a total breakdown in my diet. It's my own fault, of course. This seems to be my habit. I choose what to put in my mouth. I am a person who has to be in the right mindset to eat healthy and exercise. Scott wanted to walk the last two evenings and I said I didn't want to.

It occurred to me that the reason I am tired and feel like hell is because I'm not eating healthy. When I started my weight loss quest, after the first couple of days, I felt amazing. I had energy and I actually wanted to get off my butt and do something. This entire week, I have felt like crap! I am shocked at how lousy I feel and then I have an epiphany and realize...duh, it's what you're eating dumbass!

So, with that in mind I'm ready to go back at it. Maybe I do need to go to another WW meeting. I wasn't that impressed with my first meeting, but it did motivate me. There were women of all ages at the meeting. Some thin, some....not so much. Scott has been in the same boat and he keeps asking me when we'll start walking and stop eating junk. He's ready, I need to be too.

I get ticked because I know that I won't lose enough to look good in a swimsuit this summer, but I didn't put this weight on overnight. It's come on over the last 7 years, mostly since I had John four years ago. I really let myself go. Then I remind myself that I'd thought about swimsuit season last fall and at that time I could have done something about it but didn't. I'd just had Sam and I could have kept up my eating habits from pregnancy...would have been better than the route I took by getting back into my old eating habits. I was sick during my whole pregnancy so I was used to eating very little and staying away from pop and chocolate.

Well, hindsight is 20/20 right? So, I need to focus on the future and make small changes that will help me be more healthy. Then, add the walking and I'll be much better.

Not much fun in my post today. It's more of a reality check. It's really tough to lose weight and to eat healthy and make yourself exercise every day. But I try to think about how I felt when I weighed 45 pounds less than I do right now. I remember that I had confidence. I felt good, I was not tired all the time, I had energy. I felt like I looked good. I want to get back to that.

I Went on Vacation......From My Diet?

I've been away for a few days. Scott talked me into going camping at the last minute so we packed up the trailer and we were gone. Only three days, but it felt like a week. Have you ever camped with a baby?

I shouldn't complain because she really was good. She slept better while we were camping than she does at home. Must be the fresh air she was getting all day. I was pleasantly surprised at how good Sam was. The only problem is that the weather was a little cool, and it was windy. That's what made it so hard.

The kids had a great time. John really enjoyed himself. He even had his very first S'more. Yes, we had smore's and no, it's not diet food. How can you diet when you are on a mini vacation? We had hamburgers and hot dogs, of course. And I even made my famous shiska-bobs! They were delish. That wasn't so bad for the diet. Chicken, veggies and the marinade was fat free (zero points) italian dressing. I topped it off with ONE smore. I could have eaten two or three, but tried to tame the chocolate beast. Plus, I walked....alot. We camped further from the bathrooms this time to get a view of the lake so we had further to walk to the potty and shower. We always cruise the campground when we are camping anyhow. Usually, on our bikes but I took Sam in the stroller and walked so I didn't totally blow my 10 or so pounds. I'm going to give it a few days before I step on the scale again, don't want to give myself a stroke.

So, I have laundry and unpacking to do. I thought I should at least say hello since I've been gone a few days.....and without warning. More later.....

Late Night Munchies

Last night I didn't even know what to do with myself. I wanted to eat. So, I called Sally! She didn't answer the phone! Ok, so I start to do some dishes and I'm taking care of the laundry I folded earlier in the day.....then I wander over the to fridge. I'm thinking of a gallon of chocolate pudding covered with a gallon of cool-whip! MMMMMM

The phone rings and I'm saved. It was Sally, thank goodness because I was right on the edge. We talk until almost 11pm and even though I still wanted to eat junk food, I ate a pickle. (Didn't see that one coming did you???)

So, Sally saved me from the pudding snacks. I don't even think I told her that. I may have mentioned the pickle but who knows. Today has been better, and we walked. That makes me think....we've been feeding the swans when we walk. They hang out in the middle of the river and when they see us cross the street in this one spot every night, they swim over and we feed them crackers. So, this mom and dad swan had five babies, a couple of days later it was four, yesterday it was 3 and tonight only one. It's so sad and I don't know what happened. We've been watching alot of boats running up and down the river so I don't know if they are getting hit or what. I just know that I felt bad....just what I need, to be feeling bad about a grumpy swan.

Enough on that. When we were walking back home Sally and Alice were driving by and stopped to chat. So, that was a nice surprise. Now, I'm sitting here....with a pickle again getting ready to
watch Days on the DVR. I told myself that I can't go into the kitchen anymore tonight. It's just too tempting to grab something. So, I won't.

I Discovered I Have Friends

Last Saturday I took John to Little League and I made the nicest realization about my life. I was standing near the bleachers and my mom and dad walked over to where I was. I was standing there with my FRIENDS. Janice, Alice, Kathy, Ann! My sister and I are on the outs right now and for the last few years we'd been pretty tight. When this first happened I felt like I had nobody and I felt alone but Scott reminded me that I have Janice, and Sally, and Alice. Three of the sweetest and most supportive friends a girl could ever have. I'm not forgetting Kathy and Ann. So, when I was at baseball and my mom and dad walked up to me, surrounded by my friends, it occurred to me how lucky I was. I appreciate the fact that I have such good friends who are there for me and we enjoy spending time together. It made me feel really good.

Making My Point

When I weighed myself this morning it was another yo-yo. It's crazy! I've been keeping track of pounds to lose. I started out with 38 pounds and thought I would reassess. So, I get on the scale the second day and I have 36.5 to lose. The next day was 36, then 36.5, 36, 33, 34.5, 35, 36, 28, 31, 29. See how it goes up and then down....but the higher number keeps going lower....so I guess I'm seeing progress.

Since Saturday I haven't been writing my points down. Ok, I feel like I can be honest here so that's why I'm telling everyone. I haven't been writing my points down. In my mind I was thinking that since I had pizza again on Saturday and, who knows what else, I didn't write down the points and then I got lazy. I'm eating much less and I'm working in the yard and walking almost 2 miles every day. So, I figure I am losing so why bother. WRONG! I think that my weight loss could be going so much better if I am counting my points. Shame on me!

I can't really keep track of my food if I don't write it down, I know better than that. How easy is it to take a handful of this or a few bites of that when you are getting meals together? I don't want to ruin it now. I know we're only talking about 10 pounds here, but I do feel better. I do have more energy and it'll only get better. I started thinking last week when I was at a five pound loss and I told Scott that five pounds isn't just a little bit. Think of a 5 pound bag of sugar! Go to your cupboard and get out a five pound bad of suger and think about how many of those are hanging on your body as extra fat! That's what I'm talkin about!

Ultimately I want to get rid of 10 bags of sugar. For now, I'm sticking with trying to get rid of my original 38 pounds. Small goals, for me anyways, are better. Doesn't 50 pounds seem HUGE? It feels like a huge goal and back when I went through a divorce I lost 38 pounds in 4 months. I kept it off for two years and that is helping motivate me. 38 pounds! Alice has done it. She has lost more than 40 pounds! YEAH!!!!! Janice told me just last night that she's down by 25 pounds. She thought it was closer to 30 and was bumming....but HELLO....25 pounds girl! That is 5 bags of sugar so be proud of yourself. Weight loss is frigging hard, and if it was easy everyone would be a size 2! ( I get that from Scott! I was bitching about my classes being so hard and he tells me if it was easy everyone would be doing it.)

Speaking of Scott, he has been motivating too. I could have easily skipped walking the last few days because of all the yard work I'm doing. But, he just says, "lets go" and we go. Last night we walked more than two miles. John was with us on his bike, of course, and we walked our usual but we went all the way to Main St and over to the Showboat so John could feed the ducks. There were some mom's with tiny babies...they were so damn cute. So, we fed the ducks and the swans (and their babies too). It was 9:30pm by the time we got home and John was exhausted and so was I. Scott worked in the heat yesterday so I know he was feeling it too. But, he keeps me going! I think he wants to see that lingerie too! :)

T.

Are We There Yet?

SSDD! Little Miss Sami is not a late sleeper. She is an early riser and that's just the way it is. Obviously another early morning. We have the same routine. She wakes up and starts yelling for Scott, to no avail. I'm laying in bed thinking...."please Scott, wake up.....wake up....WAKE UP!!!" Well, that is on the days he is home. After all, she's yelling "daddy". Does she think I'm daddy? Noooo, because she claps her hand and yells "daddy" when Scott gets home from work. She's just screwing with me. Ok, that's just how it is.

Another day of dishes, laundry, and housework. More stone shoveling and weed pulling in the back yard. With all this hard work I'm sure that the weight is just pouring off me. Let me just say that again, I am sure that the weight is just pouring off me! I know it is.................I can feel it falling off my body. I'm confident. I have been working so hard around the house, in the yard, and walking. I drove our walking route today and we are just shy of 1.7 miles. So, we are walking and we are walking when it's hot. The weight is pouring off me and I know that my old jeans will fit me. I go to my closet and there they are. Hanging! I pull them out, I step into them and start to pull them up. I know that I'm there because these babies are going to be loose on me. You know, because the weight is pouring off me. I start to pull them up and I'm getting nervous. Have I gained weight in my legs because they don't feel as loose as they should???? I pull, then I yank, then I cuss! Yeah, they are going over my rear end. Well, I know I'm smaller so I yank them even more and squeeze them on. One deep breath in and.....there's no way these babies are getting buttoned. I yank them back off and hang them back up. We are NOT there yet!

Death To The Plus Size Swimsuit

I'm completely exhausted tonight. I have been on the go since 7:30am and it's late. I busted my butt in the house today, even though you wouldn't know it if you showed up on my doorstep right now, and outside my house today. Scott and I did a bunch of yard work and I was so tired. Then he walks out and say's to me, "it's after 7:00 it's time for our walk". I'm thinking, your kidding right?

Then the thought of creeping into my swimsuit came into my mind. Ok, I'm getting a visual right now and it's not pretty! So, I decided to walk. I told Scott that I was beyond tired but the thought of getting into my swimsuit was disgusting, so I better go. So, we did. And we added on two blocks so that's good. I'm going to drive it tomorrow to see how far we are actually walking.

Have you seen a plus size swimsuit in the store? Haven't I already complainted about this? Why aren't they black? Isn't black more slimming? I need one that slims me by about 10 sizes I would say. Do you think they could make one that would slim my chin? A swimsuit that slims from by nose to my ankles, yes that is what I need. Couldn't they at least make them one color? Why big bold prints, WHY? Why solid color on the bottom that changes to big bold print right at the waist...where you DON'T want attention, WHY? This is my motivation.

My Friend Alice Inspires Me

Yesterday was Monday, and Monday's are always hell. Then toss in the fact that it's the first full week that the kids are on summer break and things were just plain crazy here. I love summer vacation except for one thing and if you know me, then you know what the one thing is. It was just really hectic because none of us are into a routine for the summer yet. Jason kept saying he felt like he should be doing homework. See, even the kids feel it. Once we get through this first week, things will smooth out.

So, move past Monday because Monday's suck at my house.

My friend Alice, who I met through Sally, inspired me to do something great with my side yard. See, twice I've been invited to Alices place to have a girls night out with her and Sally. She has this cute patio with wicker furniture, which I love and want for myself, and a little table. She even has a lamp, which I love! The patio has flowers around it and it's just so cozy and that's where we hang out and laugh and sing. (And smoked 20 grape cigars that gave us ashtray mouth for two days.) Anyhow, I just love her patio because it's cozy.

So when Scott and I started walking a week ago I started noticing that other people around town have some pretty cool setups for their outside patio's. Two houses in town have a deck on the back of their homes and for lights they have the icicle lights that you put up at Christmas. I LOVE this, it looks so cool. And again, my mind goes back to Alice's patio and her bamboo thingy's that hold the citranella stuff....what the hell are those things called???? Well, she has them by her patio and it looks so cute.

I started thinking that I want an outside place like this. We have a deck on the side of the garage and a back room to the garage too. I think it was supposed to be more of a three season porch. Well, Scott put all new drywall in there and fixed the ceiling. That has the door off to the deck. I told Scott I wanted to fix up the deck and the side yard. He say's, "oh so we can stare at the camper". What a typical guy! So I shake my head and decide that I'll do whatever the hell I want to do!

I got on the scale this morning and it goes up and down so much that I wasn't so shocked to see a 7 pound weight loss. I think I said 10 pounds yesterday, but it's the friggin water. At least it's going down and I haven't gone back up to where I was. With that said, I decided I need to get the back yard looking better before I can get the deck in order. Half of our back yard is weeds and the other half is weeds and grass. So, Scott and I spent all afternoon raking and pulling weeds in the far back and then planting grass seed. We still have a shit-load to do but I felt good that we got a long section of it done.

I feel like if I'm outside working and not sitting on my ass then I should be losing weight. I'm definitely not eating as much as I did before. I'm not strict dieting either and that's why it's easier. I talked about this before, when I seriously restrict my food then I fall off the wagon really fast. Ok, I got off topic here, I was getting at the fact that I was busting my butt in the yard instead of sitting on it. Then, I went for the deck. I swept it, cleaned up the side yard and moved a bunch of stones. I feel really happy with what I accomplished today. I was shocked at how much energy I felt like I had today. I did laundry, cleaned my bathroom, swept the floors at least 10 times, vac the floor, raked and pulled weeds, planted grass seed, weed n feeded the front yard. I swept the deck, shoved stone, picked up leaves and stacked wood. Amen!

So, back to the beginning. Alice, you inspire me. I love you cozy patio and I want to have a place like that at my house. Now I need to hit some yard sales to find goodies to decorate with. I need to bench cushions, pots to hold flowers, a little table, and some icicle lights to hang. I even have the bamboo thingy's. Then we'll have a girls night out at my house!

Days Of Our Lives: Sami & EJ

You probably already know that I love Days of Our Lives. I know Janice watches it! Not sure who else does in my circle.

I just want to voice my opinion that I'm pissed at the story line with Sami and EJ right now. I love them together and they had to bring Lucas back...YUCK! I have never liked him. I'm so sick of hearing Sami and Marlena say, "Lucas is the love of her life". Whatever! There are no sparks with Sami and Lucas. I know that they need to have the soap opera drama, but it was so much better when Lucas was in prison. I actually looked forward to seeing it every day. AND, in true soap opera fashion they keep having Lucas threaten Sami with custody of Allie. Like a court would actually give a convicted felon custody over a babies mother.

Then, Janice tell me what you think, with Max and Stephanie. As soon as they get these two cute kids together they have Max acting like a freak. WTF! All of the sudden he's got some mental issues or something. I don't like what they have going there either.

And Daniel and Chelsea? He's been hooking up with someone? The writers want us to think it's Lexi but I don't think it is. They should have kept Billie and gotten her together with Daniel, much more realistic.

Last, but not least, Cloe! She is such a puke! I don't like her and I have never liked her. Now, they have her screwing Phillip? What about Morgan? I thought they would be getting them together.

We'll see what happens this week. I DVR it so I don't have to watch the crap. It takes me about ten minutes to watch a one hour episode. Pathetic. It was getting so good for a while then the writers just blew it. Seriously.

Ok, and don't worry, I know it's a soap and it's not reality. It's just fun to gripe about it. LOL!

Yada Yada Yada

It's Sunday night and I've had a rough couple of days. Pizza, my enemy, my desire! What is it about a diet that makes me want to eat pizza for every meal? I'm sure there is some kind of psychological answer to that???? So, it was the weekend, BC delivers, yada, yada, yada, I have pizza leftovers in my fridge.

I weighed myself almost every day this week and I went up and down. Obviously, I noticed the up and down in direct correlation with how much salt I had the night before. I can always tell when I've eaten something salty. My shoes are tight the next day. Remember earlier in the week when I discussed my water retention? My 50 pounds of water retention?

Well, I ended up with a 3 pound loss for the week. I have to admit that I wasn't as strict as I should have been for the last two days. Scott's weekend shift really screws things up for dieting. (How does that affect me???) Another excuse. Jason and Jourdan were gone, I was bored and I ate too much. I did ok until yesterday. However, I still lost three pounds this week and that is better than staying the same or gaining more weight.

I decided it was Graphites fault that I didn't exercise for two days. Scott has to work on the weekend so I couldn't go walk. Scott works 12 hours and sure doesn't feel like walking 2 miles when he gets home. After being in the heat all day he wants to shower and sit in the cold house. Ok, that really didn't work for my conscience so I decided today that I better get off my ass and do something. So, Jason and I went out and used a hoe to put our garden in. Yes, instead of using a rototiller, we did it by hand. I know, morons. Jason was bitching the whole time that it's too late to put in a garden. I decided that I already bought the seeds and I needed to get out of my recliner....so I was going to put the garden in anyways.

So, for over an hour we worked in the back yard and got peas, beans, and melon planted. I felt better after working. Feel like I've been hit by a truck, but that's ok. At least I got up and did something and got to add some points back onto my WW points list. Was a bad day for points.

I almost forgot, I went to Walmart today. I went so I could meet the kids and get them home early. (They were happy.) So I tried on a pair of tan capri's that were one size smaller than what I've been wearing. They fit! I was so thrilled to get a size smaller. So, I bought them. I'm so sick and tired of not having any clothes to wear because I'm too frigging fat to fit into my nice clothes. I always look like a slob because nothing fits. So, I have some nice tops but needed a pair of tan capri's. Now, I won't feel so bad about going out and about with Scott. He always looks nice and I always feel like a slob. But, I'm finally doing something about it.

I started thinking that the reason I've failed before at dieting is because I cut out everything I love. I discovered this week that I can have pizza and still lose some weight. I should not have had it twice in one weekend, but I think that I've gotten over my craving and am ready to cut back a little more. This is why I think points are better with WW. I'm feeling like I don't have to completely starve and live on salads, which I hate by the way, to lose weight. Three pounds is better than nothing.

See ya!

From My Friend Kathy

One for the girls

Now I lay me down to sleep

I pray the Lord my shape to keep.

Please no wrinkles, Please no bags

And please lift my butt before it sags.

Please no age spots, Please no gray

And as for my belly, Please take it a way.

Please keep me healthy, Please keep me young,

And thank you Dear Lord, For all that you've done.

Day 4: Getting The Funk Out of My Trunk

I stepped on the scale this morning and I was a whopping 5 pounds lighter!!! After a rough day on Tuesday I tried really hard to recover from my pizza breakdown. I did good on my points and made sure I ate breakfast. Big difference in the way I felt all day. By the end of the day I still had 14 points left.

Yesterday (Wednesday) was crazy. I feel like I have done nothing but run all week but yesterday seemed really hectic. I had all this stuff to do and I was on to the go until dinner. Then, we had to rush off to football camp for John. So, I sat in the drizzle and humidity for an hour watching John have the time of his life playing football. When we got home I put Sami down for bed and the Scott and I hit the road. I would have been just as happy to sit in the recliner and watch the news for an hour, but that won't get me anywhere. So, we walked. Same route we took on Monday and it felt really good. I was winded and tired by the time we got home, but that's a good thing. It paid off when I got on the scale this morning and discovered that five pounds have come off my body! Ladies, the funk is now leaving the building!

Scott called me from work this morning and he is down 5 pounds too! That made me happy. I hate dieting. Really, I HATE not eating whatever I want. At least I'm seeing something on the scale to let me know that what I'm doing is working. Five pounds is a small goal toward what I want to get to, but it's better than gaining or staying the same. I found out today that my best friend Janice has lost 30 pounds on her quest for weight loss. YEAH!!!!! I'm so proud of her because losing weight is so frigging hard.

Things I'm looking foward to:

• Wearing a tank top in the summer.
• Being comfortable in my jeans without feeling like I need a Navy seal to extract me at the end of the day.
• Sitting on the beach without thinking everyone is looking at me. Yikes!
• Wearing some of the lingerie Scott has never seen.
• ENERGY, ENERGY, ENERGY!
• Bring laundry upstairs without feeling like I need a chair lift.
• Bring laundry upstairs without thinking I'm going to have a stroke!

What are YOU looking forward to?

Day 3: Not As Bad As I Thought

Late last night I decided I should probably count my WW points to see how bad I'd blown it for Day 2. I was shocked to discover that I really only went over my points by 3 and it brought me back out of my pizza funk.

I didn't mention on yesterday's post that I'd lost 1.5 pounds when I weighed myself. So, a pound and a half less of me to love, YEAH! This morning I was another .5 less. So, all is not lost after my pizza craving. I don't know what it is with me, eveytime I even think the word "diet" I want pizza.

I figured out what happened yesterday. Scott and I had an appointment in Greenville at 9:30am and I skipped breakfast. Then I got too hungry and it screwed me up for the whole day. When I get too hungry I make BAD choices. So, mental note on not getting too hungry.

I was talking to my friend Ann this morning and we both agree that we miss having the energy we used to have. At a time when a mom needs an unlimited amount of energy just to survive the day, we feel like hell because of our weight. So, I'm two pounds closer to the dream. Maybe I should make a wish list.

• I want to have more energy.
• I don't want to be embarrassed to wear a swim suit at the beach.
• I want to wear some of the clothes I've been saving for the last 8 years (because I was going to start my diet on Monday and get back into my favorite clothes.) Yeah, right.
• I want to have sex during the day without all my clothes on. (With my husband, of course)
• I just want to look good.

Just a few of my goals. I didn't exercize yesterday so it won't happen if I keep that up. It was raining all evening and I used it as an excuse not to do anything. I have a treadmill downstairs, for crying out loud. Scott and I planned on playing tennis while the kids were at football camp but it didn't happen. Again, the rain thing. So, I'll drag my sorry ass out tonight and walk. I don't lose another pound if I don't walk. I could starve myself and not lose a pound if I don't exercize. Too bad typing and talking on the phone didn't burn more calories.

Day 2: Typical Me

Ok, so I had pizza for supper! That's how Day 2 went. What a dumbass!

From My Friend Alice

Today I will make a difference. I will begin by controlling my thoughts. A person is the product of their thoughts. I want to be happy and hopeful. Therefore, I will have thoughts that are happy and hopeful. I refuse to be victimized by my circumstances. I will not let petty inconveniences such as stoplights, long lines, and traffic jams be my masters. I will avoid negativism and gossip. Optimism will be my companion, and victory will be my hallmark. Today I will make a difference.

I will be grateful for the twenty-four hours that are before me. Time is a precious commodity. I refuse to allow what little time I have to be contaminated by self-pity, anxiety, or boredom. I will face this day with the joy of a child and the courage of a giant. I will live each minute as though it is my last. When tomorrow comes, today will be gone forever. While it is here, I will use it for loving and giving. Today I will make a difference.

I will not let past failures haunt me. Even though my life is scarred with mistakes, I refuse to rummage through my trash heap of failures. I will admit them. I will correct them. I will press on. Victoriously. No failure is fatal. It's OK to stumble - I will get up. It's OK to fail - I will rise again. Today I will make a difference.

I will spend time with those I love. My children, my family my friends. You can own the world but be poor for the lack of love. You can own nothing and yet be wealthy in relationships. Today I will spend at least five minutes with the significant people in my world. Five quality minutes of talking or hugging or thanking or listening. Five undiluted minutes with my children, family and friends.

Today I will make a difference.

Max Lucado

Day 1: Taming The Beast

Day One: Oh I am so thankful that this day is under my belt. Day 1, the day that I always have good intentions and then have a brownie with my lunch. Day 1, the day I plan to walk 2 or 3 miles and end up walking 2 or 3 feet to the fridge. Day 1, the day that I feel so starved and so deprived that I CAN'T STAND IT ANYMORE! So, I eat.

I'm counting my points and I actually had 3 to spare at the end of the day. I wasn't really hungry all day until tonight...so I ate some pickles, they are free. Dieting consumes every thought in my head when I'm trying to lose weight. The world ceases to exist as I know it and all I think about is when it's time to eat again. It wasn't soooo awful today. I stayed busy and then Scott and I walked with the kids for about 45 minutes.

I actually think the day went well, considering I'm in diet hell. Maybe Scott WILL get to see me naked in this lifetime.

Am I Alone?

So I sent my Blog page to my friends yesterday and I'm still alone here. WTF!!! I'm still waiting for someone to comment. Hello, is anyone out there?

So last night I actually had a girls night out with Sally and Alice. It's the first time in.....hmmmm......probably five years that I've been out without any kids and didn't have to hurry home. It was the most fun I've had in forever. It was the most fun I've had in five years while wearing clothes. We had coctails and they were delish! That should be real good for weight loss, but I only had four....and a lemon drop shot....and a couple "Kick in the Cahonies" shots. Then I smoked about 10 little cigars. What the hell was I thinking? Yeah, I got picked on because I was choking on them, and I don't know how to light one, or hold it, or not suck it in and not inhale. After I got home I brushed my teeth and still felt like I had an ashtray in my mouth. Even all day today I felt like I had an ashtray in my mouth. I don't know how smokers do it. Sally told me this morning that they just get used to the ashtray mouth, LOL!

You know, speaking of that, I've heard of people taking up smoking or chewing to lose weight. Does anyone know if it works? Then what happens when you want to quit smoking? I can't think of one person who has quick tobacco and didn't gain weight. I'm just curious, I don't plan on taking it up or anything. Scott would sneak and chew behind my back when he was shedding weight....didn't make me happy. That's all he needs, tongue cancer.

Well, I stayed out really late, until 1am. Then the baby had me up at 6:45 am. That was a real treat. Crying baby, headache, ashtray mouth, less than five hours of sleep. Gotta love that. I had great intentions of getting up and out this morning. I needed to finish my grocery shopping for the big diet kick-off Monday morning. I have four loads of laundy in the works by 9:30 am, had my shower and a little coffee and still had a tough time getting out the door. I finally had to sleep in the recliner for about 45 minutes while the baby had her morning nap. I remember begging my daughter (yeah, I know) for a few minutes to close my eyes and could she please listen for the baby. I was so tired I just couldn't stand myself....so I got a catnap. A rare treat.

I did make it to Meijer, about 3pm for the last of my groceries for the diet. Preparing for a diet is like a huge production and I know damn well that it will be a miracle if I make it through one day of point counting. My neighbors are both doing Weight Watchers and he is doing great counting points, she is not doing so great. Her words, not mine. We'll see how it goes. Scott is on board with me so I hope that he is going to help keep me moving. He is always so good about making me excersize so I am going to tell him not to go easy on me. He likes to walk over to the tennis courts at the school and kick my ass in tennis. I tend to be a sore loser so I don't like to play even if it is good excersize.

I keep sitting here thinking about summer being here. The thought of going onto the beach in my swimsuit makes me sick. My little guy has a friend and his family spends alot of time at the same lake we like to go to. His mom is petite and I'm the elephant woman. Oh how I dread summer and having to wear a swimsuit. I am trying to channel that into some motivation. You should see my swimsuit. Dark blue skirt thing for a bottom and the top is like a snippet of amazon jungle. Big bold leaves and maybe some flowers, I can't even remember. But it is scary. I don't know what the makers of Plus size clothing are thinking. "Here's a plus size woman, lets put large floral prints on her in bold colors." Yeah, that's attractive. I tried on a couple of suits at Kmart because they were black and I thought that might help hide me a little bit. I looked like a stuffed sausage. There was no hiding anything. Have you ever tried hiding a big zit on the end of your nose? Yeah, it doesn't work because there is no hiding it.

So, I'm laying here in bed on my laptop and I'm thinking that I should go have a snack. See how my brain works? I feel like I've made enough excuses for myself. For four years I have convinced myself that there are reasons for not losing weight. I'll give you some examples:

• I just had a baby. (Almost 8 months ago)
• I have my period so I'm carrying some extra water. (Only good for 3 days out of 30)
• My body has always retained water. (50 pounds worth????)
• It's my thyroid. (Or the cheesecake.)
• My metabolism is slow. (Or I'm too lazy to excersize.)
• I don't have time to work out, I have four kids. (Or, again, I'm too lazy to excersize)
• I get too bored on the treadmill so when spring gets here I'll start walking. (It's too damn hot to walk outside today, I'll do it tomorrow.)
• Tennis is good excersize but Scott always wins and I hate that. (He is better than me and I get a really good workout, and I'm too lazy to run that much.)
• My clothes shrunk in the dryer. (Or I eat too much dessert.)
• My back hurts so I can't excersize. (It would feel better if I lost some weight.)

I would love for my friends to share their lists with me. I've tried to get my friend on board with dieting with me. She said she needs to mentally prepare for a diet. She did Atkins a year or so ago and lost 80 pounds. YEAH!!! Scott and I tried Atkins and we only lasted for about a half of a day. I could eat weird stuff at weird times of the day to stick with it, but Scott hated it. So, that was the end of that. Anyhow, my friend and I have shared alot of weight frustrations. You know what we hate....we hate back fat! You know what I mean. We hate the back fat. And it's the last place I'll lose any weight. No, the first thing to go on me....my chest. Trust me, I have little to spare so I hate that about dieting.

Ok, so tomorrow is the big day. I'll check in tomorrow night and let you know how the first day went. I'm not sure what I'll be fixing for Scott and I to eat. I'm working on a menu and that should help. Wish me luck.