An Up-hill Battle

Losing weight is definitely an up hill battle.  Unless you're a man....then it's more of a small incline.  I started dieting 2 1/2 weeks ago and I've lost about 10 pounds and I'm pretty happy with that.  Scott has been on the same diet and has lost about 20 pounds.  Figures!

I feel like I'm hanging in there.  Changing your lifestyle cold turkey can be a really tough thing to do.  I'm so used to eating salty and sweet foods.  Chocolate can soothe away any of my problems.  And after the HUGE sugar overload that happens around the holidays, I feel like I really did quit good food cold turkey.

I'm trying to keep things interesting by recording shows on the DVR.  I can watch them while I'm on the treadmill and skip the commercials.  I'm wishing it was spring so I could walk outside.  The time seems to go alot faster when you're walking outside.  I think that boredom is half my battle when it comes to staying on the treadmill for longer periods of time. 

Tonight, I was standing in my closet and I started wondering if I could fit into some of my smaller jeans.  I've already gone down one pant size and I have a stack of jeans that are the next size down.  I decided I was either going to be really happy or I was going to see that I need to work even harder.  My jeans went on comfortably and I can easily wear them tomorrow.  So, that's 2 jean sizes.  YAY!!!!

I was pretty excited.  When you look at me, you probably wouldn't notice these 10 or so pounds.....but I notice it when I put my clothes on.  I started rummaging through my closet and I pulled out a really fancy silk robe that I've had for years.  It's floral and so beautiful.  It was so expensive and I saved for a long time to buy it.  So there it's been hanging in my closet for more years than I care to admit.  For alot of years it was just too tight across my shoulders, but tonight it went on and it was also comfortable.

The last thing I tried on was some pretty dark blue lingerie.  It has spaghetti straps and it's the softest silkiest material I've ever had on.  I bought it probably two years ago and it's been haning out in my closet ever since.  I've never put it on.  Well, I did try it on when I bought it but it was snug.  Way too snug for me to wear it in front of Scott but I was sure that I was going to lose weight and it would look good on me.  Not the case!  I put that night gown on tonight and it fit me.  I was so happy! 

I'm not saying that I look super-good in....well.....anything.  But when I put that lingerie on I felt good.  I have 30 pounds to go until I'm at my goal weight but at least I know that I can put some of my clothes on and have them fit me.

I think that I was starting to burn out on this diet.  I was starting to feel like the weight wasn't coming off fast enough.  I know they say you aren't supposed to lose weight super fast, but when you are dieting and working out every day you want the weight to come off fast.  Even though it put 10 years to put the weight on.  Back to my point.....I was starting to get really tired of the treadmill so I try a few things on out of my closet and it just makes me feel motivated again.

There are things hanging there that are smaller than what I tried on tonight.  It makes me want to get into those clothes.  I guess I just needed to find what motivates me.  I tried to get Scott to put together a reward type of thing for our weight loss.  We couldn't really think of anything.  I was thinking a new wardrobe if I lost so much weight.  Or even a long weekend trip someplace for the two of us.  It boiled down to the fact that whatever the reward was, it was going to come out of the same checkbook that I have.  I'm too cheap to spend money on me, so I couldn't get motivated by that. 

And if I wanted to reward that involves other fun things....well Scott has a habit of not following through with those types of things.  Maybe that will be better once we get ourselves in better shape too?  :)

I guess I need to just keep reminding myself why I wanted to get healthy in the first place.  I'm 42 and I have young kids.  Simply put, I want to be around for a long time.  I want to see them grow up and I want to see my grandkids (someday) grow up.  That's my motivation.

Until next time....